Seriously?

I’ve often been amazed at the things people will say and defend.  Amazed.

For most of my life, I was accused of being too sensitive.

I love that.

Too sensitive.

I am too sensitive when I care about others feelings.  Or the impact my words or actions may have on another.

Wow.

Now I will be the first to say, I am not responsible for another person’s feelings.  Most of us aren’t in touch enough with our own emotions, yet are quick to take on the baggage of someone else’s.

That’s not what I do.

While I can’t control how another may react, I can increase my awareness around certain words or phrases, especially when dealing with someone different than me.

See, my sensitivity muscles were built around cultural issues.   They were easy to develop.  Trust me.

Here’s how:

When I was growing up in a community that was 98% Caucasian, I’d wonder why the white kids felt so comfortable comparing tans after summer break and saying in my presence, “You’re as dark as a nigger.”

Oh yeah…and the time I went to meet a friend’s parents for dinner and they apologized for not serving watermelon or fried chicken.

Uh-huh.

Oh, and there was the time that a boy’s family forced him to back of a date with me because the Bible says, “tribes don’t mix.”

And my all time favorite, whenever I would meet someone in a corporate environment whom I had been working with exclusively over the phone, “You don’t sound black.”

Yes, people are a trip.

Of course, they never mean anything by it. How dare I be “offended.”

For a long time, I was.  Now, I just wonder when we are going to get it.

Here are 3 quotes from news stories I’ve read recently:

“I’m not some peacenik, pot-smoking hippie who wants everyone to be in love,” Hoh said.

“It has nothing to do with racism. I’m not doing it {asking his Spanish-speaking employees to Anglicize their names} for any reason other than for the satisfaction of my guests, because people calling from all over America don’t know the Spanish accents or the Spanish culture or Spanish anything,” Whitten says.

“We’re getting to the point where you can’t say Merry Christmas anymore,” he said. “Anybody who looks at these things and applies some common sense to it, I have a hard time seeing people saying it’s something bad.” (Frederick Maryland mayor’s response to display of 3 faceless dummies hanging in a willow tree, reminding some of the good old lynching days.)

I’m curious as to why a peacenik (pot-smoking or otherwise) who wants to see world peace is a bad thing. (Oh yeah, cause that cultural of violence and war is serving us so well.)

I wonder why I would be upset if someone asked me to change my name to Pedro because was Lisa was too confusing for others to say or pronounce. (Heaven forbid I try to learn something new or expand my horizons past Podunk, USA)

Hmmm…and if I lived in an country where lynchings were attended like a Saturday afternoon barbeque, why anyone might be offended at even the “joke” of a hanging. (Didn’t you know that they  postcard I have of the family with a dead man hanging from the tree behind them is a freakin’ collectors item?!)

Silly me.

And really, saying Merry Christmas isn’t offensive at all.  I guess I can now safely assume that Happy Hanukkah will be well-received by non-Jews this season.

Here’s what my buddy, Tim Wise, recently posted about the hotel owner’s position.  I see it as a response to anyone who thinks “political correctness” has run amok.

…here we see a few of the biggest problems with some white men: a sense of entitlement to do things as we please, to hell with others; a sense that others have to change to suit us, rather than ever having to change ourselves; and a belief that our way of doing things is best, even when it might well be racist, not to mention, stupid as hell.

Yup, stupid as hell.

Seriously, people. No one is asking you to tip toe around.  Just be willing to see things from another’s perspective.

Geesh…it isn’t that hard.

Seriously.