I still have the final 3 episodes of Oprah on my DVR.
I started to watch the star-studded episode and was so thrilled to see Madonna come out on stage.
Considering all this woman has accomplished in her own right, I found it moving that she admired Oprah. I hung on every word until she said of Oprah, “You’ve got balls.”
What the f***?
I HATE that phrase.
I HATE that it implies that having balls somehow makes you more courageous, gutsy, heroic.
And I hate even more that women use the phrase all too often.
What it says to me is that women are somehow inadequate, less than, weak, unless they, well… are more like a MAN (parts and all).
Here’s what I know:
It doesn’t require balls to make the decision to carry a child in your womb. A decision, by the way, that could very well cost you your life.
It doesn’t require balls to terminate a pregnancy either. Facing the truth that for whatever reason, you cannot bring a child into this world has to be one of the most heart-wrenching decisions a person could face.
It doesn’t require balls to say, “I love you” first. (Love doesn’t keep score)
It doesn’t require balls to say, “I love you” to someone who will never say it back. N-E-V-E-R.
It doesn’t require balls to stand back and watch your children fall down, endure heartache, disappointment or failure. Giving them the space to learn and grow hurts like hell.
It doesn’t require balls to let your children go out into the world. Yes, that too, hurts like hell.
It doesn’t require balls to take your own mother off life support. Even though you would do anything to keep her in this world and you have no idea how you will ever go on without her, she trusted you with that decision. And that trust didn’t require balls either.
It doesn’t require balls to stay in a job you hate or to leave it either. Only you know what’s best for you.
It doesn’t require balls to look a homeless person in the eye and recognize your shared humanity.
Courage, tenacity, fearlessness, bad-assness, boldness, fierceness are not functions of body parts or testosterone, people.
It’s about HEART.
You’ve got one.
So do I.
What are you going to do to expand your heart today?
To open it so wide, you swear you just might die.
To risk being seen, laughed at, hurt, humiliated, rejected OR dare I say, ACCEPTED.
For. Who. You. Are.
I promise you, balls are not required.